How to Keep an Emcee’s Horrible Introduction from Tanking your Show

When you get a horrible introduction from the Emcee, what do you next could mean the difference between a great show and a nightmare gig.

In this article, I’ll give you a sure-fire technique to keep an Emcee’s horrible introduction from tanking your show.

Flaws of the Emcee

There are a ton of ways an emcee can ruin the introduction for a comedian. They can bomb a joke then immediately bring you up. They can create an incident with someone in the audience and bring you up on a sour note. They can screw up your name or screw up your intro.

They can do a backwards intro. A backwards intro is where they mention your name first and the audience doesn’t feel the impulse to applaud…

It could go like, “Jerry Corley is a comedian from California. He’s here to entertain us tonight and make us laugh and boy do we need a laugh after they just announced all those layoffs. Here he is…” and they just leave it like that and hand you the mic.

Now you walk on to jaded applause with an audience whose enthusiasm is worse than an inmate who’s just been denied parole, you know?

What to Do?

So what do you do when you get a horrible introduction from the emcee?

I’ve been doing stand-up for 27 years and I’ve played almost every situation imaginable. I’ve played crowds from 4 people to 40,000, (opening for a huge country band). I’ve had some great introductions and some horrible introductions and I’ve learned how important they can be (if they’re framed right) and how inconsequential they can be (if you play it right).

Horrible intros often occur when doing corporate events. The people introducing you are not professionals and situations can easily get awkward.

But I’ll take that any day, because you can make a lot of money doing corporate gigs. In fact, you can make more money at one corporate gig than spending three weeks in comedy clubs!

It’s your job to stay funny

First and foremost, you have to remember that you’re a comedian. It’s your job to stay funny in spite of the situation. They came to watch a comedian who can make fun of stuff, not some twat who gets offended because someone didn’t intro them professionally.

I usually deal with a horrible introduction by talking about it. The other night I did a private holiday event for a condo services organization. The event was in like the happy-hour/bar area of the Marriot Renaissance. You know the kind of place where they advertise to their guests that if you get there between 5-7pm you can get “$5 drinks and light snacks?”

It wasn’t best venue or setting for comedy. The ceilings were high, the crowd was spread out all over the place, there was no stage, the lighting was awful and because the ceilings were high, the sound bounced all over the place, filling the room with an echo, which made it difficult for people to hear anything I was saying–especially for the people in the back and to the sides of the room.

And if people have to really work to hear your words, they’ll stop trying and just start talking. Of course their voices will now fill the echo chamber and now you’re trying to talk over their talking.

The good news was that the show started at 5pm, so if the show didn’t go well I could still get the “$5 drinks and light snacks!”

The emcee greeted everyone. She was polite and professional, but just before she brought me on, she read a letter to the audience that a member of the board of directors wrote for this group… Now a letter is meant to be read, not spoken and the letter was 5 pages long!

Every time the emcee went to read the next page, she fumbled with the mic and the pages, creating this awkward gap of silence, that the audience seemed to use to reengage in their conversations.

When people are told that a part of their evening’s entertainment is going to be a comedian, they are not expecting someone reading a 5-page dissertation.

That’s like going to a strip club and before the stripper comes out, the DJ says something like, “Gentlemen, before Mercedes starts peeling off that sexy lingerie, she’s gonna read about 5 minutes of some Haiku she’s written! So get your dollars out and get ready to tip her on her immaculate 5-7-5 structure!”

She could read the most brilliant Haiku in history, but that’s just not what the audience showed up for.

So after she’s done reading this thing, she brings me up to an audience who is now about as excited as someone who just got their assignment for jury duty.

Turn the Dilemma into Comedy

So I decided that I’m just gonna have fun with this moment.

She gave me the mic and I said, “Thanks so much. How about a hand for Kimberly, ladies and gentlemen. Doesn’t she do an incredible job? Boy that’s gotta be tough, but you handled it with such grace, Kim.

First, the boss telling you he’s not gonna be here, then saying he wants YOU to get up in front of the audience and read his letter. The only thing that would’ve made that letter less appealing is if he ended it with “…and by the way, starting on the 1st of January, your homeowner’s association fees are going up a hundred bucks! Happy Holidays!”

Dealing with the audience on the spot with something that just happened, let’s them know that you are with them, in this moment, not just going up there to recite your act.

The audience laughed at that opening and, moving forward, every time they didn’t laugh, I looked at them and said, “Hey you know, I can always have Kim come back up here and read that letter again!” The audience enjoyed the fact that I handled the awkwardness of the moment with humor and that I maintained a playful approach.

I don’t always recommend that you deal with a situation like that the way I did. Audiences at a corporate type function like this one can be very tribal. They know the person you are making jokes about more than you do and they can get defensive and turn on you fast.

So I sometimes will just refer to another event I did where the intro was “REALLY AWKWARD.” Sort of comparing it the one they just experienced.

It might go something like this…

After she’s done reading the letter and then introducing me, I might say, “Thanks so much!” How about a hand for Kim, ladies and gentlemen. Doesn’t she do a great job. As a comedian I’ve got to say it’s tough to follow a 5-page letter, but it’s not the most awkward thing I’ve had to follow…

…I once did an event for the Montana State Assembly and just before they brought me up on stage the emcee said, “Can I have your attention please? We’ve come to the entertainment part of our evening, but before we do that, I would like us all to have a moment of silence. As you know, less than a month ago, Assemblyman Kyle Nance was killed in a fiery crash on I-90. He leaves behind a wife and 3 kids…”

Keep in mind, I’m standing right there, waiting to take the mic!

They all bowed their heads for what must’ve been the most awkward 60 seconds ever!

I actually heard sniffles in the audience!

… then I hear, “and now for your comedian…”

And she hands me the mic.”

The audience at the Marriot Renaissance, was able to laugh at that difficult situation I was faced with and by stating a situation that was much more drastic than the one they were just faced with, they felt like they were off the hook.

It enabled me to tap into the laughter triggers of recognition, embarrassment, superiority and release. Knowing this gave me tremendous confidence that the audience would laugh with me.

So next time you’re faced with a horrible introduction from the emcee, just remember: don’t blame them, and always stay funny!

25 Ways to Make Money with Your Comedy

25 Ways to make money with comedy

Every now and then you see an article on stand-up comedy and how much money comedians make–or rather don’t make.

Then there’s this article from the New York Times which portrays a not so dismal outlook for comedians.

What are we to believe?

I can only give information on what I’ve experienced as a comedian and a writer. Bottom line is that once you can write and perform comedy and you’re able to work clean, you can make a very decent living.

The problem is that most comedians (especially the new ones) see comedy through a very small lens and they don’t look at ALL the opportunities that are available to them.

Most don’t even know these avenues of revenue exist.

When I started out as a comedian I wanted to learn all I could about the business. And watching my father go through his ups and downs financially as an actor, I looked at comedy, not as frivolity, but as a business. Once I did that, I saw all the possibilities and I focused on the ones that would give me the best return.

So I put together a quick list called 25 Ways to Make Money with Your Comedy.

All of the concepts are viable and most of them I’ve actually utilized with varying levels of success.

But this is a quick list to give you an insight and help motivate you to get good at comedy so you can start to make money doing what you love.

Keep in mind the money varies. I just put down what I have earned in my experience from these events.

  1. Stand-up. Perform in Comedy Clubs or One-niters on the road.
  2. Do college comedy shows (Pay $800-$3500 per show)
  3. Work Cruise Ships ($1500-$4000 per week)
  4. Perform at Corporate Gigs ($400-$5000+ per gig)
  5. Do Comedy shows as Fundraisers for non-profits or schools ($600-$2500 per event)
  6. Work as a T.V. Audience Warm-up Comedian ($1500-$2000 per gig)
  7. Emcee Events in Vegas ($1000-$5000 per week)
  8. Host Trade Shows in Vegas and other cities
  9. Become a Radio D.J.
  10. Write for Late Night TV or Variety Talk Shows ($4187 per week min. ((network))
  11. Write Humorous Greeting Cards ($ varies)
  12. Write Humorous T-Shirts or other gifts
  13. Write fluff pieces for magazines or internet sites
  14. Be a commercial copywriter in advertising with a humorous twist. (Some of the most memorable commercial campaigns are humorous spots (Progressive Insurance, Geico, Discover Card, DIRECTV)
  15. Write Joke Books
  16. Do a comedy spot on T.V. (Comedy Central, Late Night TV, Netflix, Showtime Special)
  17. Write a humorous blog or podcast, build a following sell advertising or get a sponsor
  18. Have a humorous YouTube Channel. Develop a following. Sell Advertising or Merch
  19. Go on tour and open for a band on the road. ($3500-$10,000 per week)
  20. Write humorous speeches or jokes for politicians, CEOs, corporate presenters. ($500+- per page)
  21. Punch-up comedy scripts
  22. Punch-up or write sitcoms
  23. Punch-up or write copy for Animated explainers.
  24. Write comedy movies (I wrote “Stretch”) which reached Critically acclaimed on Netflix. Still receiving residuals
  25. Create a humorous Theme based assembly show for schools, (ie: Prevent bullying) ($1500-$2500 per assembly)

So there you go. 25 ways to make money with your comedy.

The purpose of this post is to give you an idea of all the ways you can create revenue streams if you get good at your comedy.

If you’re thinking about a career in comedy you can drop in and take one of my upcoming stand-up classes.

Or if you are already working professionally and want to learn how each of these revenue streams really operates you can stream my course called “How to be the Richest Comedian Nobody’s Ever Heard Of.” Which is a blueprint for how I was making a $250,000/yr. in comedy without being a household name and without an agent.

In the meantime, use the list to motivate yourself and open your eyes to the cool ways you can make a living in this awesome business.

How the ‘Broke Artist’ Mentality Keeps many Talented Comedians Broke

think-broke-stay-broke-post-pic2

Business guru, Napolean Hill wrote a best selling book (over 100 million copies sold), called “Think and Grow Rich”

Comedians should have a book called “Think Broke and Stay Broke.”

A large percentage of comedians today have that ‘broke-artist’ mentality. They actually think their way into staying broke.

It’s exactly that mentality that keeps them broke.

Reality vs. Perception

I think part of the problem is reality vs. perception.

Here’s the reality: If you can get laughs consistently and work in almost any environment, you are a valuable commodity.

Here’s the perception: It’s an art, so you shouldn’t think about money.

The problem with that approach is that if you’re not thinking about making money, you ARE thinking about being broke.

When I ran an ad on Facebook for my comedy business seminar called, “How to be the Richest Comedian Nobody’s Heard Of,” where I drill down 20+ ways to monetize your comedy, either in writing or stand-up, one comedian actually commented with, “Don’t even expect to make any money in comedy until you’ve been doing it for 10 years.”

Like somehow 10 years is the magic number?

In other words, “think broke until the end of the 9th year.”

Sad part is, he’s not the only comedian that thinks like this. In fact, I sometimes think that more comedians think this way than not.

This is a bullshit belief system. Why do I say that? Because these comedians love to make these big, broad claims when all the evidence to the contrary is right before their very eyes.

Seinfeld

From the first time Jerry Seinfeld took the stage in 1981 at Catch a Rising Star in NYC, it took him only 5 years to get on the “Tonight Show.” After that, he was made.

Letterman

Letterman was in Indianapolis watching The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson. He kept hearing that comedians were appearing at the Comedy Store. He saw an association between the Comedy Store and The Tonight Show, so he moved to L.A., got into the Comedy Store and within 3 years he was on The Tonight Show. He was made.

Both of those guys were making money in comedy before that. Not a lot of money but they were getting paid gigs.

My Own Experience

I was making money less than 2 years into doing comedy and many of my students are doing it just 2 years in as well.

At 27, I had just started dabbling in comedy. I left L.A. to go back to school and finish getting my degree. I wanted to get a degree so I could have something to fall back on just in case my career went in the toilet.

While at college, to make a little money, I got a job teaching comedy traffic school.

At the end of one of my traffic school classes, this student in class approached me. He said, “Hey Jerry. I’m the president of the local Chamber of Commerce. Every year we have an annual dinner where we swear out the old officers and swear in the new. Every year, every Chamber in the country does this. I was wondering if you could emcee that event then do like 30 minutes of comedy. We’ll pay you $800, feed you and give you beer.”

I thought Wow! Beer! 🙂

I did the gig. It was a lot of fun. I hired a videographer to get the event on a broadcast-quality video. I got my check for $800, ate the food and drank a beer.

3 days later, I got a call from the neighboring Chamber of Commerce. The gal said, “Hey Jerry. We hear you did a great job with the Chico Chamber of Commerce. I was wondering if you could do the same for us?”

I did the gig. It went great.

Then I thought how many Chambers of Commerce are there in the country?

Turns out, there’s 7,650.

I mailed out flyers to 200 of them. I booked 28 gigs in a 3 month period, all at $800. That’s $22,400. Or close to $7,500 a month. Not bad for a college kid with no agent, right? And that was in 1991!

Here’s the killer. At that point, I hadn’t done one single club gig yet.

I knew right then, that I had a business. I WAS the BUSINESS.

Note: I don’t say any of this to brag or anything. I say it to point out the possibilities.

Leveraging My Comedy Business

I sent out more fliers and booked hundreds of Chambers around the country.

But, there’s more…
One of the tricks I use to write comedy is to look up definitions. Definitions give you a starting point. When I looked up the definition for the Chamber of Commerce it said, “A local association to promote and protect the interests of the business community in a particular place.”

I thought to myself hmmm… an “association…”

How many associations are there in the U.S.? According to the IRS there is 1.53 million and most of them want a comedian at one of their events.

They just don’t know it: yet.

I recently did a gig for the Northwest Regional Tow Truckers Association, (who even knew they existed?!).
They paid $3500 for one night, flew me in, paid for my hotel and fed me.

And with 1.53 million associations out there, the available gigs is endless.

So when another “broke-thinker” says to me, “you can’t make any money in comedy until you’ve been doing it 10 years:” I say, “No. YOU can’t make any money in comedy. I’M doing okay.”

When you learn how to treat comedy like a business by learning how to create multiple revenue streams, how to scale and how to take advantage of something called “idle capacity,” not only can you learn to make money in comedy, but you can learn to build a comedy enterprise and create a great living.

And this is why I share this information. Because comedians have to get it out of their heads that they are competing with one another. There are enough gigs for everyone. You just have to know where to find them.

All you have to do is stop thinking like a broke artist and start thinking like a business
person.

“The Nightly Show” with Larry Wilmore Canceled by Comedy Central Provides New Opportunities

larry-wilmore-the-nightly-show-canceled

It was only a matter of time before Larry Wilmore’s “The Nightly Show” on Comedy Central got the axe.

Following that brutal appearance at the White House Correspondents Dinner where Wilmore looked like a new comedian trying to get one laugh before he got the light, it seemed like it was just a countdown to Wilmore’s show being struck from the programming board.

Quite frankly I don’t know what Comedy Central was thinking giving Wilmore his own show in the first place. Yes, he’s smart and funny and a great writer, but that doesn’t convert to that on-camera gusto that is needed to develop, let alone compel and retain an audience. Especially an audience of 18-34 males. (Comedy Central’s main demographic).

Sure, Wilmore’s great. But he lacks pizazz and on-camera comes across as dull.

It seems like Comedy Central has been struggling to grab an audience in the variety talk show space since Jon Stewart took his exit.

According to Deadline Hollywood, now that Wilmore is gone, Comedy Central plans to fill the slot with @Midnight until they find a replacement.

That’s a Bad News–Great News Scenario

That’s great news, creatives! Think about it: what’s been missing since Jon Stewart left the Daily Show? The energy, the edge, the razor sharp and laser-quick wit and instincts of Stewart.

Sure Trevor Noah is funny and smart. But he doesn’t have that contemporary, modern high-five-me-at-bar type of gusto. Neither did Wilmore.

I think Comedy Central made a huge mistake allowing John Oliver and Samantha Bee to flee to HBO and TBS. Have you seen either of those shows? They have the edge and the energy that is totally missing at the Daily Show.

And I mean really? TBS? That’s like the ‘witness protection program’ of television; nobody knows they’re there!

Isn’t that right Conan?

If you haven’t seen these two shows, watch ’em. They’re filled with that attack-the-status-quo-energy that the Daily Show currently is missing since Stewart left. In my view the secret sauce comes from the contemporary and relatable analogies the hosts draw to the misgivings of the targets of their ridicule.

They’re not only entertaining us, they are informing us and increasing awareness.

That’s exactly the pattern that was used when Jon Stewart was at the helm.

I’ve got to tell you, that when stuff like this is happening in our industry, I get all charged up!

I mean sure, a show got canceled, but you gotta look at the bright side. The show wasn’t sustaining any numbers.

Where some people see failure, I see amazing opportunity!

I mean what a perfect time to self-produce a show that has that edge.

If I was new writer trying to break in, not only would I be writing and submitting packets every three to six months, I would be collaborating and self-producing a 5 min. edgy variety/talk show just like the Daily Show with the same type of enthusiasm and gusto that was ever-present at that show.

Why would you self-produce?

*Because with the technology we have today, it’s easy. You can download Wirecast (http://www.telestream.net/wirecast/) and produce a multi-cam show using your iPhones.

Want to do it cheaply get the FREE TRIAL of wirecast, then upgrade to eliminate the watermark for $9.99

Better yet, use Open Broadcast Software (http://obsproject.com/). It’s a little less user-friendly, but I’ve heard good things. One of the really good things I heard was that it is FREE! *

**(The asterisks indicate an update since the post was first published).**

The simpler, the better because you don’t want to get bogged down in the editing bay.

Better yet, rehearse a tight 5-minute, well written show and live stream it! Then develop an audience and a subscriber base, then you can create pressure on the the industry to the point where they have to take notice of you.

Think about it. If you develop a really strong following that’s watching you because you stream solid content on a daily or semi-daily basis, somebody in the industry will take notice.

You can put it up on Twitch.tv and build your fanbase. There are gamers on there right now with 30-thousand + subscribers. Subscribers who pay 5 bucks a month to be there.

Even if you have a rusty calculator in your head, it doesn’t take but a second to realize that that’s bank.

Who’s Gaming on That Platform?

Twitch.tv has over 100 million monthly users and they just added a comedy category on that platform. Can you say, “ground floor opportunity?”

Here’s the kicker… 75 percent of the users are male and 73 percent are ages 18-34; Hello? are you listening? That’s the exact demo Comedy Central is coveting!

That’s how you work outside the system to develop notoriety inside the system.

Besides, what an amazingly cool thing to do while you write and develop your Late Night TV packets for (in-system) submission.

You’re basically repurposing your writing, using it on your self-produced show while you’re still submitting it in your packet.

That’s just cool!

You want a quick show that’s well-written with cutting jokes and with a host that has a strong and dynamic identity; preferably with an edge of sarcasm or cynicism.

In other words, someone who’s not afraid to call ‘bullshit,’ and make it relatable and funny.

So if you don’t know how to write comedy in that fickle Late Night TV structure, then now’s the time to get those skills so you can begin to participate at a level that just 2 years ago was unheard of.

So get to work on your shows, creatives!

Comedy Central is dying to see it!

3 Reasons Why Firing My Manager is the Best Thing I Did for My Comedy Career!

 phone firing my manager
In September of 1993 I was in the comedy condo of a comedy club in Dallas, TX. It was the morning after my third night there and the phone rang.
“Hello, it’s Jerry.”
“Jerry? It’s Harry:” Harry was a manager I had just signed with a few months before.
He saw me at a showcase at Igby’s in West L.A. on the same night that Ray Romano and Kevin James did their network showcase for NBC.
Harry had some big names in his stable and I thought it was a good move to work with him.That’s good news, my manager’s calling. Maybe he’s got some work for me…
“Hey Harry. Tell me some good news.”

“I just wanted to let you know that I get 20% of whatever work you’re doing, regardless of if I book it.”I know, right? I’m thinking to myself, this guy doesn’t even ask how the shows are going. He just gets right to the money. The money he thinks he’s entitled to.

For the last couple years, I had been methodically making phone calls and sending out videos. Since I already had an one-hour act under my belt, a full 60% of my day was dedicated to booking work and developing new contacts and 40% to writing material.

That work had paid off because I was booked for the rest of the year and the first 2 months of the following year. For this manager to call me and tell me he’s gonna get 20% of that just seemed ridiculous.

So I said, “I’m sorry, Harry. I don’t think I heard you right. Can you repeat that?”

“I just wanted to let you know that I get 20% of whatever work you’re doing, regardless of if I book it.”

I straightened up, took a breath and said, “Harry, I’ve always wanted to say this. (It was a throwback to the movies from the 40’s), ‘WE’RE THROUGH!'”

: and I hung up the phone.

About 10 seconds later, he called again. He said, “You have a problem with me making money?” I said, “I don’t have a problem with you making money, Harry. But I do have a problem with you trying to take money from me that you haven’t earned. I might as well give 20% to the homeless, because they’re doing as much for my career.”

I hung up and never heard from Harry again.

That phone call scared me. It scared me, but it also inspired me into truly lighting a fire under my ass and figuring out how to take my act and make real money.

I got to work and the next year I made nearly 3x as much as the previous year. I learned how to leverage my comedy and turn it into a product. I learned how to double, triple and even quadruple the amount of money I made per night, per show.

Then I learned how to tap into markets that were paying me more in one night than I was making in an entire week at a club.

Then I learned about something called “Idle Capacity…” (Hint: It adds a lot of money to your bank account)

Hanging up on my manager was scary but empowering, because when you do something like that your only choice is to go prove yourself.

Not only that, consider the opposite: This guy’s integrity was questionable so how do I expect that to reflect on me?

That phone call was life changing and it helped motivate me to really kick ass in this business and turn my comedy career into a comedy enterprise where I’M the BOSS and I can choose what gigs to take.

Being able to feel like you are in charge of your destiny rather than waiting for someone to call you or book you is more than just empowering, it’s life changing.
Don’t get me wrong, a great manager or agent is invaluable, but one who doesn’t do anything is shit.

You may have heard that I’m teaching a comedy success seminar next Saturday, August 6th, at my studio in Burbank, CA. It’s called “How to be the Richest Comedian Nobody’s Ever Heard Of.It’s going to be a powerful event with killer tools you can use to gain more leverage in your career and really get paid for your comedy.

Click the link and get in because at minimum it will light a fire under your ass. And if you actually apply the information and execute, it will change your career or your life.